He passed away a month ago and he now visits me ALL THE TIME./u/ExistingExternal3362

The Paranormal | January 27, 2023

He passed away a month ago and he now visits me ALL THE TIME./u/ExistingExternal3362

A month ago, I had to deal with probably the hardest passing I have had to deal with up to this point in my life. My once best friend and ex-fiance overdosed on fentanyl and passed. We broke up a little over 5 years ago due to his addiction (I am not one who ever has or ever will use drugs but sadly he fell down that path). We did not end things on a bad note, however, after years and years (6 years to be exact) of attempting to help him get over his addiction (including but not limited to rehabs, clinics, therapists, support groups, etc) I could not take it anymore. I could not stand the lies. I could not stand the bullshit. Most of all, I could not stand watching him kill himself. It was his addiction that really helped me understand the famous saying "If you truly love someone, sometimes you have to let them go". That is exactly what happened. I was afraid I was enabling him by saying if things don't change, I have to end things and not acting on it.

A little background:
Right before we broke up, I gave him an ultimatum, which was either make a real effort to change by leaving his triggers behind and work towards bettering himself emotionally, mentally, physically, and professionally (which I will support) or respect that this not the life I want and it is time that we end things.

He gave me the most honest answer any addict could give which was "I want to change, but I can't promise you I can, and I understand where you are coming from and will respect your wishes". As hard as it was to end things, we did. At this time, I was living 100 miles away from him because I was in college and though he had a lot of his property in my apartment, he stayed with his parents because he had a bar job there (which really was where he would get drugs). He drove down to have this conversation but it was after midnight when he arrived. I asked him to take his cat home, gave him my ring, and said I would pack his stuff and arrange from him to come pick it up. He agreed. We cuddled for about 30 minutes, talked a bit, he then grabbed his cat and left. One of the last things I told him before he left was to never let me get the call that he died, he laughed and told me that would never happen.

After that, I never saw him again. His mom called me a few days later and said he went to inpatient and would be coming down to grab his stuff when I was ready for her and his dad to do so. His family and I got along wonderfully (and we still do), so I was happy to have them come down and we arranged for it to happen. As I was loading their truck, his mom and I were talking and she thanked me for everything as well as reiterated that she did not blame me one bit for leaving. She prayed that he would get clean and live a full life, to which I agreed. I told her I don't ever want to get back with him, but I want to see him live and happy full life and hope that we can be best friends again one day.

We both moved on, I met an incredible man at school, who I am still with today. He met another sweet woman whom he had a kid with. Sadly they did not work out, however, he dated multiple sweet ladies, including the lady he was with when he passed.

I would periodically get texts from him, and though I would reply, I was definitely not the talker between the two of us because I never wanted to give him false hope that we would get back together, and I would hear through the grapevine periodically that he was still using (which his pictures on social media supported because I could see it in his face).

This is where things got weird:

On December 16, I got the call I always feared. Our friend from Hawaii (where we lived for 4 of the 6 years we were together) called me to tell me he overdosed and was in a coma (what was crazy was that I turned off my Facebook messenger notices a few weeks earlier because I was getting so many notifications yet before this call came in his brother and sister-in-law tried to message me on there). I of course lost it. Our friend said he was flying out to stay with his family and go see him so I told him we will talk when he gets here.

The next day, our Hawaii friend texted me and said his mom said there was no sign of brain activity but they had more tests to run. It was this night when things started to get weird. I woke up around 2:30 AM from a dead sleep and I felt him leave. It was a feeling I never felt before, and I knew right there and then he was gone. I knew he was not coming back.

The next day, I called a few other people who we knew in Hawaii that did not know what had happened to tell them he was in a coma and we were not sure if he was going to make it. As I was talking to one of these guys, I suddenly felt that I was about to get that call that he was officially dead. Within 2-3 minutes, I had another call come in, it was his brother-in-law. I answered and said "is this that call?" and he mumbled through his tears, "yea, I am so sorry". I said "Okay, thank you, I love you bro" he told me he loved me too and we hung up.

That night I woke up at 3:30 AM from a dead sleep and heard his laugh clear as day in the living room (he had a very unique laugh that I could recognize). I could not go back to sleep. I was in tears, I knew he was there.

Later that day, my boyfriend and I started to pack for a trip we were getting ready to go on the following week for Christmas. My boyfriend had his Spotify on, and it eventually started to play random songs that were similar to his playlist. 3 of my favorite songs that my ex would play (he was a musician) came on in a row. It tripped me out so much that I went and restarted the playlist midway through the 3rd song.

The next day, I went to the store to grab a couple of last-minute gifts and toiletries for our trip. As I was in the store, the same 3 songs that were played the day before in the same order started to play. When the third song came on, I dropped my items and left.

That night, I woke up from a dead sleep at 3:30 AM but this time is was because I felt someone sit on the end of the bed. I knew he was there.

The next day, my boyfriend and I flew out for our holiday trip. We landed in Vegas because it was the closest airport to our destination. I had never been to Vegas, so we toured the strip before departing to our destination. I was having so much fun, then guess what starts playing in one of the casinos THE SAME 3 SONGS IN THE SAME ORDER! I was completely freaked out. I could not believe it.

Things settled for about a week, with the exception of waking up EVERY night at 3:30 AM precisely. This time though I would not hear, sense, or see anything, I would just wake up.

The day we were getting ready to head home, my boyfriend's brother was driving us to the airport, and guess what comes on the radio... THE SAME THREE SONGS IN THE SAME FREAKEN ORDER! By this point, I already accepted it was him.

His funeral was the day after we got home. Which I went to. His family was happy to see me, our friend from Hawaii was happy I was there, and many of our mutual friends were there and were very happy to see me. All and all, I was glad I went, but it was hard.

I had a couple of nights where I slept through the night, then he started to appear in my dreams. The first few I shrugged off as my grief. The third time he appeared in my dream, I could not dismiss it as grief. He kept telling me that I need to try Hard Cider with Whiskey as we sat in a recording studio with two of our other friends who passed years prior, I kept trying to tell a group outside of the room something through a loudspeaker something but kept getting interrupted by my ex and our other deceased friends. When I woke up, I could not stop thinking about the drink. I reached out to my friend from Hawaii who was staying on his family's farm later in the day and asked him without any context "do you all have a thing with hard cider with whiskey?". He laughed and was like "ya bro, why?". This was not a thing I knew about, and it was definitely not a thing when me and my ex were together. So I was mind fucked, but was like "okay".

After this, I started to wake up every night at 3:30 AM until LAST NIGHT.

Last night, I had the craziest dream of them all. My ex and I were in this random hotel room in Vegas talking. He then started to ask about my current boyfriend, but not in a way that was uncomfortable, more like he wanted to know more. I told him how happy he and I were and that I think we were the best thing that ever happened to each other. He smiled and told me he was happy for me, and that all he wanted was for me to be happy. He asked me if I would lay down and cuddle with him though. I said I would but nothing sexual because it was not fair to my boyfriend. He said okay. We did. He whispered in my ear and told me that he will always love me, always be happy, never give up, and to change the world. Then I woke up.

Today has been rather crazy. I have been presented with three incredible opportunities out of the blue (one academic and two professional) all of which I am considering and taking the next steps to apply for and all of which would allow me to build on my life-saving research project. In addition, I got a random message on LinkedIn from someone asking me if my current employer is hiring, which I verified they are.

I cannot say that this was him or if it was all in my head. But somehow I feel a sense of peace. I know that he always cared for me, and I always cared for him, but we were on two different paths in this world. I don't feel scared, and I no longer feel alone. I have my best friend back, I have part of my old group back, they are just spirits, which I am totally okay with (and in some ways almost happier about because they are always there).

I know some may dismiss this, but maybe my story will bring a sense of peace to others. Death is not the end, it is just another form of life. I do not understand it, but I do not fear it. All I know is that having my spirit homies is badass and though it sucks that they died, I am glad they are around me.

submitted by /u/ExistingExternal3362
[link] [comments]A month ago, I had to deal with probably the hardest passing I have had to deal with up to this point in my life. My once best friend and ex-fiance overdosed on fentanyl and passed. We broke up a little over 5 years ago due to his addiction (I am not one who ever has or ever will use drugs but sadly he fell down that path). We did not end things on a bad note, however, after years and years (6 years to be exact) of attempting to help him get over his addiction (including but not limited to rehabs, clinics, therapists, support groups, etc) I could not take it anymore. I could not stand the lies. I could not stand the bullshit. Most of all, I could not stand watching him kill himself. It was his addiction that really helped me understand the famous saying "If you truly love someone, sometimes you have to let them go". That is exactly what happened. I was afraid I was enabling him by saying if things don't change, I have to end things and not acting on it. A little background: Right before we broke up, I gave him an ultimatum, which was either make a real effort to change by leaving his triggers behind and work towards bettering himself emotionally, mentally, physically, and professionally (which I will support) or respect that this not the life I want and it is time that we end things. He gave me the most honest answer any addict could give which was "I want to change, but I can't promise you I can, and I understand where you are coming from and will respect your wishes". As hard as it was to end things, we did. At this time, I was living 100 miles away from him because I was in college and though he had a lot of his property in my apartment, he stayed with his parents because he had a bar job there (which really was where he would get drugs). He drove down to have this conversation but it was after midnight when he arrived. I asked him to take his cat home, gave him my ring, and said I would pack his stuff and arrange from him to come pick it up. He agreed. We cuddled for about 30 minutes, talked a bit, he then grabbed his cat and left. One of the last things I told him before he left was to never let me get the call that he died, he laughed and told me that would never happen. After that, I never saw him again. His mom called me a few days later and said he went to inpatient and would be coming down to grab his stuff when I was ready for her and his dad to do so. His family and I got along wonderfully (and we still do), so I was happy to have them come down and we arranged for it to happen. As I was loading their truck, his mom and I were talking and she thanked me for everything as well as reiterated that she did not blame me one bit for leaving. She prayed that he would get clean and live a full life, to which I agreed. I told her I don't ever want to get back with him, but I want to see him live and happy full life and hope that we can be best friends again one day. We both moved on, I met an incredible man at school, who I am still with today. He met another sweet woman whom he had a kid with. Sadly they did not work out, however, he dated multiple sweet ladies, including the lady he was with when he passed. I would periodically get texts from him, and though I would reply, I was definitely not the talker between the two of us because I never wanted to give him false hope that we would get back together, and I would hear through the grapevine periodically that he was still using (which his pictures on social media supported because I could see it in his face). This is where things got weird: On December 16, I got the call I always feared. Our friend from Hawaii (where we lived for 4 of the 6 years we were together) called me to tell me he overdosed and was in a coma (what was crazy was that I turned off my Facebook messenger notices a few weeks earlier because I was getting so many notifications yet before this call came in his brother and sister-in-law tried to message me on there). I of course lost it. Our friend said he was flying out to stay with his family and go see him so I told him we will talk when he gets here. The next day, our Hawaii friend texted me and said his mom said there was no sign of brain activity but they had more tests to run. It was this night when things started to get weird. I woke up around 2:30 AM from a dead sleep and I felt him leave. It was a feeling I never felt before, and I knew right there and then he was gone. I knew he was not coming back. The next day, I called a few other people who we knew in Hawaii that did not know what had happened to tell them he was in a coma and we were not sure if he was going to make it. As I was talking to one of these guys, I suddenly felt that I was about to get that call that he was officially dead. Within 2-3 minutes, I had another call come in, it was his brother-in-law. I answered and said "is this that call?" and he mumbled through his tears, "yea, I am so sorry". I said "Okay, thank you, I love you bro" he told me he loved me too and we hung up. That night I woke up at 3:30 AM from a dead sleep and heard his laugh clear as day in the living room (he had a very unique laugh that I could recognize). I could not go back to sleep. I was in tears, I knew he was there. Later that day, my boyfriend and I started to pack for a trip we were getting ready to go on the following week for Christmas. My boyfriend had his Spotify on, and it eventually started to play random songs that were similar to his playlist. 3 of my favorite songs that my ex would play (he was a musician) came on in a row. It tripped me out so much that I went and restarted the playlist midway through the 3rd song. The next day, I went to the store to grab a couple of last-minute gifts and toiletries for our trip. As I was in the store, the same 3 songs that were played the day before in the same order started to play. When the third song came on, I dropped my items and left. That night, I woke up from a dead sleep at 3:30 AM but this time is was because I felt someone sit on the end of the bed. I knew he was there. The next day, my boyfriend and I flew out for our holiday trip. We landed in Vegas because it was the closest airport to our destination. I had never been to Vegas, so we toured the strip before departing to our destination. I was having so much fun, then guess what starts playing in one of the casinos THE SAME 3 SONGS IN THE SAME ORDER! I was completely freaked out. I could not believe it. Things settled for about a week, with the exception of waking up EVERY night at 3:30 AM precisely. This time though I would not hear, sense, or see anything, I would just wake up. The day we were getting ready to head home, my boyfriend's brother was driving us to the airport, and guess what comes on the radio... THE SAME THREE SONGS IN THE SAME FREAKEN ORDER! By this point, I already accepted it was him. His funeral was the day after we got home. Which I went to. His family was happy to see me, our friend from Hawaii was happy I was there, and many of our mutual friends were there and were very happy to see me. All and all, I was glad I went, but it was hard. I had a couple of nights where I slept through the night, then he started to appear in my dreams. The first few I shrugged off as my grief. The third time he appeared in my dream, I could not dismiss it as grief. He kept telling me that I need to try Hard Cider with Whiskey as we sat in a recording studio with two of our other friends who passed years prior, I kept trying to tell a group outside of the room something through a loudspeaker something but kept getting interrupted by my ex and our other deceased friends. When I woke up, I could not stop thinking about the drink. I reached out to my friend from Hawaii who was staying on his family's farm later in the day and asked him without any context "do you all have a thing with hard cider with whiskey?". He laughed and was like "ya bro, why?". This was not a thing I knew about, and it was definitely not a thing when me and my ex were together. So I was mind fucked, but was like "okay". After this, I started to wake up every night at 3:30 AM until LAST NIGHT. Last night, I had the craziest dream of them all. My ex and I were in this random hotel room in Vegas talking. He then started to ask about my current boyfriend, but not in a way that was uncomfortable, more like he wanted to know more. I told him how happy he and I were and that I think we were the best thing that ever happened to each other. He smiled and told me he was happy for me, and that all he wanted was for me to be happy. He asked me if I would lay down and cuddle with him though. I said I would but nothing sexual because it was not fair to my boyfriend. He said okay. We did. He whispered in my ear and told me that he will always love me, always be happy, never give up, and to change the world. Then I woke up. Today has been rather crazy. I have been presented with three incredible opportunities out of the blue (one academic and two professional) all of which I am considering and taking the next steps to apply for and all of which would allow me to build on my life-saving research project. In addition, I got a random message on LinkedIn from someone asking me if my current employer is hiring, which I verified they are. I cannot say that this was him or if it was all in my head. But somehow I feel a sense of peace. I know that he always cared for me, and I always cared for him, but we were on two different paths in this world. I don't feel scared, and I no longer feel alone. I have my best friend back, I have part of my old group back, they are just spirits, which I am totally okay with (and in some ways almost happier about because they are always there). I know some may dismiss this, but maybe my story will bring a sense of peace to others. Death is not the end, it is just another form of life. I do not understand it, but I do not fear it. All I know is that having my spirit homies is badass and though it sucks that they died, I am glad they are around me. submitted by /u/ExistingExternal3362 [link] [comments]

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